Word has reached The Warden’s desk that several of Brushy Mountain Squares’ most dangerous repeat offenders went missing last weekend — and the surveillance footage doesn’t lie.
The Big Man, Caseworker, Babyface, Boats, Boogie, Fireball, and The Deputy — eight of the Southeast’s Most Wanted Dancers — were spotted at large in Northern Virginia for all three days of the 2026 WASCA Spring Dance Festival. WASCA (Washington Area Square Dancers Cooperative Association) hosts one of the most popular square and round dance festivals in the nation, drawing hundreds of dancers and a first-class lineup of callers from across the country. Naturally, our crew fit right in.
The gang danced every day, caused the usual amount of trouble on the floor, and — perhaps most suspiciously — was seen in the company of not one but two Tennessee callers on multiple occasions.
First, there’s Ken Burke — Nashville-based, full-time traveling caller, and a man whose own website greets you with the warning: “This Ain’t Your Daddy’s Square Dance.” Known for his offbeat humor, distinctive music choices, and an uncanny ability to get even the greenest newcomer dancing confidently, Ken was one of eight callers on the 2026 WASCA roster. Witnesses report the BMS crew was smiling far too much during his tips to claim innocence.
Then there’s The Warden himself — Steve Kopman of Knoxville, TN. If you’re unfamiliar with Steve, consider this: the man called at the New York World’s Fair at the age of seven. Seven. Son of the legendary Lee Kopman — one of the most prolific choreographers in square dance history — Steve has spent decades calling festivals, weekends, and conventions across the US, Europe, and Japan. He also happens to be the club caller for the Little T Squares in Lenoir City, TN, the largest square dance club in the Southeast. Safe to say, when The Warden speaks, squares move.
As if either one alone wasn’t enough, Ken and Steve shared the mic for a few dances together over the weekend — a collision of Tennessee talent that left the BMS crew thoroughly sentenced to a great time.
The Warden confirms that all seven north-bound fugitives have been accounted for and returned safely to Southeast territory — tired, happy, and already asking when they can do it again.
While these seven tried their best to head north and escape the long arm of the law, Snowflake, Queen Pookie, The Transporter, and Cool Hand Luke attempted another daring escape and were last seen in Rome, Georgia engaging in more shenanigans at the Western Promenaders 70th Anniversary Dance. Rumor has it that Jet Roberts was seen with this group of ne’er-do-wells. Additional details are sketchy at this time, as The Deputy awaits further reporting from local boots on the ground. As always, photographic evidence of these convicts in action is both welcomed and appreciated!
If you’d like to join the gang on our next great escape, keep an eye on our Calendar page for upcoming events. Fair warning: once you’re in, you’re in.
— Filed from the road, Brushy Mountain Squares